EMPTY NESTS, LIFE JOURNEYS, FRIENDSHIPS AND THE WINNER IS…..

Hello Autumn, October already how did that happen and how fast did this year fly by? I’m not counting this one it went way too fast so I’m not aging this time round! I’m going to have another 60th in November!

I have a beautiful autumnal painting in my home by Lucy Pittaway, I’m sharing it here, I love the way it captures this time of year, or indeed this time in life. That’s me and Steve on the bench, but no we didn’t ride the tandem in the picture. We are looking at the London skyline from a distance, I love London. In the northern hemisphere the weather changes, preparing for winter, trees shed their leaves, and it is a time when animals get ready to hibernate. It’s also a time for shedding and letting things go. For me it is time to welcome back soup! Halloween is on the way, now where did I put my broomstick?

At this time of year empty nests become topical once again, young adults go off to university and many move away from home returning only during their holidays or at weekends with their washing!! It is a transition and things will never be the same again, that much is true. Here in Malta because we are such a small island commuting daily to university is the norm, of course some students from Gozo find accommodation for during the week as it’s just easier that way for them. There are some students who may have to go abroad during their courses as part of their continued development, others opt to do voluntary work in other countries, and some opt to do their master’s degree abroad. It is all change for a while until you settle into a new, different life. Younger children return to school many of them starting new schools which is daunting, I remember it well! New routines, new teachers, new friends, it’s not easy for most while others breeze through it. We return to the school term times and the school routine begins again (I don't miss that to be honest). Parents screaming at their children to get up, rushing to get everyone to their destinations on time, or for some of us, as I recall, by the skin of our teeth. Then there are the really tiny ones who look too small to be going anywhere but off they go to start school/kindergarten for the first time and their life-long education journey begins, the world is their oyster and it is our job to show them that they are capable of anything, and I hope they are blessed with wonderful teachers as this journey starts, this had me pondering life journeys just recently.

I was driving to my daughter’s new house the other day, a new journey for me now and until I had figured out the best way to go and the best time to avoid all the traffic it felt strange, but it has now become almost automatic and it made me reflect on how in life we have many journeys and we become so accustomed to them that we become comfortable and maybe complacent and think that things will remain the same for ever (or is that just me?) I was driving along, and it was a new route, so I discovered new things and places, and this is the wonderful thing that you make new discoveries along the way and although this is a driving route the same applies to our lives. Just like those children starting school/university, it all feels a little strange at first, but you soon get used to the unfamiliar places, faces and you settle in (usually), and this life continues for a few years until the next change, could be moving home, getting married, changing jobs. You meet new people and discover unfamiliar places and if you are happy, you remain there for a while. People come and go in our lives, and life is continually changing, and I pondered on how transient things are. It was just a reflection on how life is ever-changing and how we humans are so adaptable to change. If someone had told me when I was growing up that I would move abroad and live there for many, many years I would have laughed at them, a girl that was such a homebody, who wouldn’t even consider going away from home to study! The most unlikely candidate to move away. I look back at moments in my own life and realise at the time I naively thought they would last forever but life marches on, time and tide wait for no man, right? We change but I realise now that I was more present then, more in the moment and all I would say about this reflection is that I am going to try to stop more in moments of fun and joy and be totally present. The other day I bought my granddaughter some bubbles and we spent a fun time just blowing bubbles and catching them, she invented a game where one of us would blow them and the other would catch them, then we were catching them on the wand and seeing how many bubbles we could catch that way, if ever you need to destress just buy some bubbles! I captured that moment and stored it in my heart, it’s a memory I will take out and look at from time to time, especially as she grows up. My mum now does this with memories of my children and it’s sweet to sit and reminisce with her.

Thankfully, life continues to return to normal; travel is getting easier and ‘Strictly’ is back! The glitter ball, the sparkle, sheer indulgence, I absolutely love it! Even Steve is becoming an ‘expert.’ Also, Abba is back, how wonderful is that? Their distinctive sound instantly recognisable for all of us of a certain age, all is well Abba has returned!!

For me personally, my social life has begun again with earnest, my diary is filling up as I meet with friends that I haven’t seen for 18 months/2 years, so excited to meet up again and other friends who I have managed to see in between the bad bouts of Covid numbers and who have supported me through the ‘down’ times of this last 18 months, it feels like a celebration and I’m so happy to get to hug them and catch up with all their news, which you can’t always adequately convey in a message. Maybe we are all just trying to meet before anything else happens!! No, we can’t go through that again. I have talked about friendship before and at the risk of repeating myself, friendships are so important to me and I have been blessed with the most wonderful friends in my life, my oldest friendship is 55+ years and another 50+ years and I have many others that are 40+ and so on, I am incredibly lucky. I had always thought that when you made friends that they had to last forever and if they left or moved on without staying in touch I would wonder what I did wrong, I have now learnt, with age and experience, that not everyone you meet is meant to stay with you on your journey through life and I love the saying, some friends are friends for a reason, some for a season and some for a lifetime. I am so lucky to have the most amazing ‘lifetime’ friends, friends that listen and advise and are always there for me, no matter what. They also tell me home truths sometimes which I need to hear from time to time and help me gain a more balanced view of things, to you all, and you know who you are, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

And finally, the winner of the giveaway, the lovely book ‘The Boy, the mole, the fox and the horse,’ is Sheila Bonanno, well done Sheila, I hope you get as much enjoyment from it as I do. Sheila, as many will know is my concert companion, okay mostly we go to see one man, but she is also a wonderful friend and she is one of those that encourages and supports my writing journey, with gentle prompts of ‘aren’t we due another blog?’ Thank you, Sheila!